This is my prayer for today at 3.41pm.

Lord,

This is Vania again. I know. I know. I am asking you for answers quite a lot of the time. Well you see, I know we should pray specifically and I guess I have been praying for a yes or no answer. Will that still be possible? Or do you give options. All good options and I have to decide on my own, as part of growing up? I am so confused by all the options. I need you to sit with me and go through them, since you are ultimately the best guider and advisor I can possible have.

Option A of staying back seems pretty tempting. Nice studio flat for myself, a possibility of serving you more, being able to be in the magical moments of Nathan's growing up, finishing and getting a degree but the downsides being, not being able to stay with Henna, a dissertation I have to face, missing out on valuable experience possibly needed for my 3rd year projects and the joys of distance with close ones.

Option B seems rather exciting and exhilarating too. A year out to get experience in the design industry. An option that I have seemingly wanted so much form the start of this year. A break from uni, although a internship won't be that relaxing either. The happy moments of living with my sis Trina. Able to spend time and catch up with friends and family. But the downsides are, missing out on Nathan, an internship that might not have benefited a lot, the worries of finances, not knowing where I might live and many more..

But these aren't just the only thoughts I have Lord.

Is this offer to intern in Singapore a good one? Did you open doors for it cause you wanted me to learn how to make my own decisions or is cause I would benefit from it. Advice I have been given by Singaporeans and design friends are that getting an internship in the UK is definitely better. This singapore internships are normally given to poly students and I will be a UK graduate. Design world here in the UK is definitely better. Do I just do my 3rd year and finish my degree? I can always intern after and I will be paid higher as a graduate intern. Or who knows that you might just give me a job. Or maybe a job at the place I will intern at. There are just too much to think about Lord and its crowding my mind. I just need to quieten myself and hear you Lord. Please help me to tune down my worries but just to listen to you. Advice me. Help me. Guide me.

Amen.

P.s - am I confusing you too? Might just add in a help on decision making too.